It Happened To Me
I've just watched part of the documentary film 'It Happened Here'.
I left the theater after yelling "Holy F(cKing Christ" in reaction to what one of these young women was told by campus "authorities" when she reported rape:
"If you girls wouldn't spread your legs like peanut butter..."
The body stores and remembers physical and emotional traumatic experience. When trauma goes unhealed, self-protective and ultimately destructive behavior patterns are established. This because, ego is the "I survive" presence.
Silence is one self-protective survival pattern that I know very well. Triggers like the statement above can release energy stored in the body fast enough to trump the ego's guard so that the wound finds voice in a yell such as mine.
I was raped on the Indiana University campus my freshman year at a fraternity party. That was the only fraternity party that I attended. I did not report the incident and spoke of this first to my mother many many years later.
After the rape, I turned into a straight A / A + exercise bulimic-type. Basically starved myself running until I could not run anymore and started healing.
The comment this young woman received has me a touch grateful that I did not report though it pains me to think of women and men I may have helped by speaking.
I care for the boys too. Young men are socially forced into behavior that I trust they would not engage in if the social pressure were not what it is.
I don't want anyone punished. I want us all healed. Thus, Project VIRGin.